Today I was on Facebook and noticed a post about someone who I was good friends with at one point in my life. Naturally, this led to a few more clicks and before I knew it I was looking at photos of her from 2 years ago and googling her LinkedIn to see what she was up to now. We all know the blackhole that social media can lead to. Usually when this happens, I get sad that we aren't friends anymore, mad that we haven't done a good job keeping in touch, and I'm left wondering what life would look like if we were close. It's sort of like a breakup of sorts!
I'm the kind of person who looks for lifelong friendships. I would rather have a few close-knit best friends that stay besties for life than a ton of good friends. I went to a small grade school and had two solid best friends. The girl I grew up next door to has been my best friend since we were 7 years old. In high school, I had five best friends who were my life. We spent every waking moment together. In college, I was in a sorority and for awhile it felt like I was living a life with more good friends rather than a small amount of best friends. It was hard for me and I think that was one of the reasons that I didn't 100% love my sorority until I was a junior (2 years in!). Today, my best friends are made up from a few of the people in those groups. I'm still close with most of the girls I was friends with in high school. I see my next door neighbor, who also now lives in LA, regularly. My pledge class from my sorority continues to grow closer. The girls who will be bridesmaids in my wedding will have known me for many, many years.
When I look at people from my life who were only in it for a short time, it makes me sad that we lost touch. But today, along with those sad reminiscent feelings, I'm grateful for all the short friendships I've had in my life. One of the weirdest things about finding yourself in your twenties is accepting that friendships can be fleeting. I think a lot of the sadness I've felt over the last few years has been attributed to this. But once I've accepted that it's just a part of life, I can smile at the old times and realize how far I've come since I've known these people. They have enriched my life and I owe a small part of who I am today to those girls.
To E, the girl I spent my study abroad with, thank you for teaching me to be spontaneous. When I studied abroad, I was homesick and craving the comforts of home. E quickly became my bestie away from home. She was fun, spontaneous, and the perfect person to travel with. Her independence was contagious.
To J, my Spanish partner in college, thank you for making me realize I wanted to travel. We talked about our hopes and dreams studying abroad for hours. We had so much fun in Spanish class. You were my first "non-sorority" college friend.
To L and A, the girls I met through my leadership positions, thanks for being my mentors and helping me become a better leader. We traveled to a few conferences together, and you both encouraged me to have more fun in situations where I wanted to be serious.
To O, my "school" friend in high school. We had every honors science class together. You were the one who made me realize I was not going to be a doctor, and probably never survive that AP-Chem test (yeah, definitely failed that thing). But we made those terrible classes fun and I got to know a lot about you in that time. Learning about your family life helped me prepare for when the same thing happened to mine in college.
To M, my old swimming buddy. You pushed me and made me competitive. You helped me branch out of my small private school bubble and introduced me to what real life was like in my small town. You were right alongside me when I got my first job.
I know I don't talk to any of you now. I know that if I saw you today, we would catch up and chat like old times. Even though we aren't in each others lives currently, you've taught me a lot and helped shape me.
Thank you.
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